Posts Tagged With: hope

Think BIGGER


Dear Self,

I get that your desire is to locate a second job for supplemental income. However, I need for you to think BIGGER. Maybe you’re not able to find the job you seek because it has yet to be created. Use this time to tap into your passion inorder to create a purposeful yet lucrative second income for yourself. Think bigger! Be bolder! And do NOT let money cloud your judgment. If you settle for less than you deserve, you’ll get even less than what you settled for. Hard was never easy and easy will never be hard. Hiya! So exercise your creative juices and believe that this to shall come. And so it freakin is! This is myTRUTHmyCLARITY. 

From,

Self 

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Life Goals (BIG & small)

  • Travel and serve in Africa 
  • Fall in love ❤️ 
  • Become a Teacher 👨‍🏫 
  • Become an Assistant Principal 
  • Start my own school (Principal)
  • Live in New York 
  • Live in Atlanta 
  • INSPIRE youth in underserved communities 
  • Maintain a healthy gym routine 
  • Make friends around the world 
  • Become a Father 
  • Be PRESENT 
  • Continuously operate beyond my comfort zone 
  • Appreciate my family 
  • Make six figures times ten. Networth of over 10 million. I’ll take more more! 
  • Stay true to my passion and purpose 
  • Keep moving 
  • Turn off the television 
  • Keep up with my cycling 
  • Discover relief for my feet 
  • Be my own boss 
  • Start my own business 
  • Write a book 
  • Become a motivation speaker 
  • Train teachers 
  • PHD in something 
  • Be open to love again 
  • Not become a statistic within the black gay community 
  • Leave a legacy behind that rings in the ears of many 
  • No drinking at home alone 
  • Read 12 books a year minimum 
  • Walk, skip, jump to the beat of my own dream and do it unapologetically 
  • Own a fun car: something with a drop top!
  • Moped or motorcycle on the side
  • Establish a savings account that affords me financial freedom. 500,000 plus! Times 10!
  • But my mother a house of her own
  • Create careers for others 
  • Explore and participate in New and different things
  • Attend a motivational conference 
  • Travel to all seven continents 
  • Wake up and say THANK YOU
  • Just keep swimming 
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Be Kind to Yourself 

Side eye… hand on the hip…. mouth wide open…..twist of the neck….and lots of attitude! ……….wait for it…. speak MAMA RU!

Isn’t funny how our emotions work? One minute the world feels like it’s going to end and the next minute you feel compelled to serve Beyoncé realness. 


As I bring the microphone to my lips and open up my 👄, I take in a mouthful…. OF AIR! Y’all nasty. Lol. And allow my vocal chords to do the rest. Oh… ya’ll thought I was going to actually starting singing? You’ve got the wrong blog!

I’ve revealed more than I ususally do these past few posts and I must say it’s been liberating. The overwhelming support has reminded me to ensure I’m also being kind, loving and supportive to myself. So interesting how we forget to do such a simple thing. 

I’ve recently started going to a counselor. Yes! I know….it’s still hard for me to admit it but hell I’m going to a damn counselor….and I’m unapologetic. And even better it’s covered by my insiurance. Lol. Anyway…….usually at the end of every session I try to walk away with some mantra that I can put into practice throughout the week. And this week…. you guessed right.

BE KIND TO YOURSELF ANTHONY. 


I don’t know where this journey shall take me. I surrender chile! I mean literally, I have handed over the car keys and fastened my humble ass in the passenger seat of life. SOURCE take the wheel. My GPS is off… hell my cellphone is off. I clasp my hands together, throw my head out of the car window and look up to the sky. I simply close my eyes and say thank you. This is myTRUTHmyCLARITY and so it is friends. 

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Just Keep Swimming


It’s Day 1 after the physical separation between my partner and I. Last night was tough. I mean I literally felt sick. I helped him move his stuff out and even went as far as bringing him to his new place. I don’t know if that was wise because I broke down in tears as I was about to leave. It’s interesting because the tears weren’t due to the actual separation. They were more about his well being. I just felt bad leaving him there. I mean this guy sacrificed a lot to appease my needs throughout our eight years. I kind of feel responsible for him being all the way out here in the Bay Area. It’s a hard pill to swallow which is why I spit that shit out!


I am NOT responsible for the poor decisions he made. I am not responsible for the infidelity. I am not responsible for why we are separating. Like I said to him, “I never wanted for this to happen.” I was pushed into a corner and forced to evaluate my own well being. I have enough self respect to know what I deserve when it comes to being loved. That pill that I tried to swallow can lay its ass on the ground. Matter of fact, I’ll just go ahead and crush the hell out of it. That grown man made grown decisions. And my story, my happiness, my well being will not rest upon a person who has yet to really discover and love himself. I stand tall, I stand proud, I stand courageous, I stand in my faith knowing…..that if I just keep swimming……Just keep swimming…..Just keep swimming…..Just keep smimming……true peace regarding this matter shall come. In the interim, this is myTRUTHmyCLARITY. And so it is! 

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Today is MY Day


Nine months ago on September 1, 2017 at 5:00pm my life changed. It literally folded in half within a split second and ever since that moment it’s never been the same between us. Unconditional love? What does that really mean and have I failed? I mean I literally tried everything in my power to grow, maintain and massage the trust that had been kicked out the damn door (literally). Sigh….. this whole situation has just been one big old TO DO and I’m so tired. I get relationships are work but any element of seamlessness is/was needed/wanted.


Today is the day he moves out. Today is the day I truly begin to heal GIVEN I follow his departure with healthy choices. Today is the day I get back to focusing all of my attention on me. Today is the day I halt all side eyes and just live in peace at home. Today is the day I can walk home and no longer hold my breathe wondering what’s going on… on the other side of the door. Today is the day I start dating myself, loving myself, cooking for myself, being with myself WITHOUT DISTRACTION. Today is not an ending, it’s a new beginning. It doesn’t have to be all sad and gloomy. Matter of fact….IT WON’T. Today is the day for change. Today is the day and I’m unapologetic for asking him to leave. I deserve better and that starts with SELF LOVE. I won’t put him in charge of my happiness. I stand strong like Wonder Woman :0) and will sail confidently into the unknown waters of the world. I surrender….! This is myTRUTHmyCLARITY and so it is. 

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What is your LEGACY?

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What will be your legacy? And I challenge you to think beyond the material possessions you will leave behind. I’m more interested in knowing what message your life will bring to light once you transition out of your physical body. What will your eulogy speak of? How will people reflect upon your life?

You see, I believe we all are an extension of our SOURCE and our spirits have been placed upon this earth in physical form to carry out our divine purpose. I know this to be true and recognize that my days on this earth will soon come to an end once my purpose has been fulfilled.

I am a spiritual being having a human experience and am thankful to have seen 31 years and hopefully 30 ……..plus more! As I (my awareness) observe my physical body moving through life, I am beginning to feel less attached to the body that houses my spirit (me). Lol. I know…I know…I’m getting deep. But for real….I am NOT the physical body many have come to know and observe. I am the energy that lives within this human vessel. As I embrace this knowing, I feel more motivated to take care of it (this body). I’m not hoping to fit into a certain pair of pants, or attract attention. I just want to maximize my time on this earth so that I may fully and effectively carry out my purpose.

Which leads me back to my original question: What is your legacy? The world is filled with so many distractions. And as a result, some folks stray away from their destined paths and begin living a life investing in stuff and things that satisfy their EGOs. Heck….it’s happened to me! But I’ve since learned that a great way to reflect on where you are and where you’re supposed to be……is to revisit your desired legacy.

My Legacy:

I am a man who walks confidently into the direction of my dreams. I surrender and allow life to guide me. My constant evolution affords me the capacity to serve with an abundance of love. I walk my talk and live on purpose!

My legacy serves as the energy that powers the internal GPS system of my heart. My internal GPS system has been programmed by my source which is why I am able to walk confidently into the direction of the unknown. It guides me along this unconventional journey I’ve been experiencing since childhood. My source has always had my best interest at heart while also serving the needs of others. This is my TRUTH my CLARITY!

 

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