Posts Tagged With: purpose

Think BIGGER


Dear Self,

I get that your desire is to locate a second job for supplemental income. However, I need for you to think BIGGER. Maybe you’re not able to find the job you seek because it has yet to be created. Use this time to tap into your passion inorder to create a purposeful yet lucrative second income for yourself. Think bigger! Be bolder! And do NOT let money cloud your judgment. If you settle for less than you deserve, you’ll get even less than what you settled for. Hard was never easy and easy will never be hard. Hiya! So exercise your creative juices and believe that this to shall come. And so it freakin is! This is myTRUTHmyCLARITY. 

From,

Self 

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Fishbowl 


Hey fellow writers! I always wonder how many people actually read these posts? Then I wonder why I do I actually care? I mean my purpose for writing is for me to reflect on my truth my clarity. If my journey inspires others …. great! If not… eh… it is what it is. No shade…. wink. 

Sorry folks, today’s a funky kind of day. Heck I’m just tired and it’s myTRUTHmyCLARITY. Lol. I’ve found myself trying to keep busy in order to avoid the present matters at hand. Sigh…. I’m tired just thinking about it. I keep hearing ‘one day at a time’ but these days are wearing me out! Lol. It’s interesting because I feel this need to ‘keep swimming’ 🏊 but lately I’m feeling more compelled to simply float. I’m doing all this swimming and haven’t a clue which direction I should even be headed in. Round and round I go wondering why I’m chasing my tail. The other day it dawned on me to actually stop swimming and come up for some damn air. Like literally take my head up out of the water! Well damn! Didn’t realize I was actually swimming/exhibiting in a fishbowl of emotions which speaks to why I’ve been suffocating. 

I’m tired friends….and just feel this need to float calmly in the ripples of my emotions. As I lay on my back and look up out of the fishbowl I wonder what’s out there? How do I get myself out of this bowl of emotions. My desire to change goes beyond buying a filter and changing the water. I want more than this bowl…I want to be able to leap out of this bowl and float through the winds of possibility. I want to feel free of all the pain and sorrow. I lay here floating….. feeling to tired to swim. It’s so hard to just be still but know I must if ever I am to restore my fire 🔥 to persevere. I float freely……just being with self and having faith that one day I’ll be restored enough to take the leap of LIFE out of the bowl and into the unknown. This is myTRUTHmyCLARITY. And so it is….I FLOAT. :0)

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Roller Coaster of LIFE 


I’m taking a big leap and going to share some intimate thoughts in my upcoming posts. It TRULY makes me very uncomfortable which is why I know it’s needed for growth. I’m doing this as a form of healing. Y’all, life! It sure is like a rollercoaster. One of a kind. A roller coaster with an endless track of twists, turns, hills, stops, varied speeds, and LOTS of bumps. Lots and lots of bumps. Did I mention that the coaster is also made out of wood? Yeah, so let’s not forget the constant repairs needed just to ensure it’s still functional. Y’all, life truly is like a roller coaster. 
Where to even begin? Sigh, he cheated on me. What’s worse is that I walked in on both of them completely naked. There I said it. Nine months ago I thought time would heal the wound yet it still hurts. If I could just take that moment out of my memory bank. That moment altered my entire life. That moment change everything. That moment put the roller coaster out of operation for a while. That moment….sigh is a moment I’m determined to conquer. That moment will not conquer me. That moment is my badge of honor. That moment is just that….a moment. 

My promise to myself is to live out loud no matter good or bad. This blog has always served as a form of healing. As I unpack my ‘dirty draws’ know that my intention is to heal. My intention is to forgive. And my intention is to move forward. I will no longer play victim. That moment was lurking on the shadows. It had to happen. It was inevitable. I am strong. I am beautiful. I am truly going to look back and be grateful for that moment. It’s time to open up,  Good, bad or indifferent. I surrender to myTRUTHmyCLARITY.

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I Quit! 

Yes, I quit my job four days ago and I am unapologetic. I surrender to the totality of possibilities and affirm that all is well. I know my value. I know my worth. I deserve better and walk confidently into the direction of the unknown. What awaits? I have no clue at all but trust that my Source will guide me into a purposeful cause. The totality of possibilities await and I am going to be okay. I will not allow myself to exist in a space that doesn’t ‘fill my bucket.’

This is one thing I now know to be my truth, my clarity. I quit! And so it is. :0)

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All Good Things…….

  
Must come to an end? Hell no! Man oh man my time is just about up in Costa Rica. I’m here at Gold’s Gym working off the abundance of rice, beans and plantains. Its become a regular part of my everyday diet since my arrival. 

I’m leaving this beautiful country in a few hours and felt the need to take one final walk. I happened to bump into the gym and took it as a sign. Lol. This moment is magical because I’ve got my tunes, a cool breeze and my favorite elliptical machine. I’m good. It’s the small things mi amigos! 

Day 4 was filled with lots to see and talk about. The problem is I don’t feel like typing it up in an eloquent fashion. Needless to say, I’ll list my most precious memories below.

– Took a bus tour to see Irazu Volcano 

– 13 passengers on the tour / No comment other than I didn’t come here to be surrounded by fellow Americans

– Met a couple from California (Bay Area) which was exciting because I’m planning to move there in a few months 

– My inappropriate attire (gym shorts and a t-shirt sigh…. Let’s just say it was a bit chilly atop the volcano. I wasn’t thinking lol)

– Fog and lots of it 

– Walking along the volcano crater but unable to see it due to the fog

– Rainy day but oddly it added to the beauty of the farms and botanical garden 

– The Costa Rican meal was delicious

– The actual bus ride through the town of Cartago 

– Visiting a Catholic Church 

– Visiting the ‘Ruins’

– Dinner with Keitsa 

– Hotel Kekoldi 

– Shopping at the supermarket 

As this vacation comes to an end, I challenge myself to find joy in the daily routine of life. Don’t slip back into the coma of habitual behavior. Actually, find a way to deter from the routine as often as possible. Be present and most importantly live daringly! 

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SOURCE is REAL

  
How can SOURCE not be real? There’s definitely something out there that is greater than you and me put together. :0)
“Costa Rica February 17, 2016”

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MY LEGACY 

  
As I walk CONFIDENTLY into the direction of the unknown, I embody a KNOWING that everything is going to be just fine. I am GUIDED by my SOURCE to SERVE and GROW on and with PURPOSE. 

My LEGACY is one that speaks to living your BEST life while also exercising your PASSION through SERVICE. LIVE beyond your COMFORT ZONE and be OPEN to receiving the many OPPORTUNITIES that move into your life. MOVE with LIFE because it truly is a DANCE. Allow it to GUIDE you and remember to SMILE along the way. I am YOU. You are ME. We are ONE. One with SOURCE. 

  
This is my TRUTH my CLARITY my LEGACY :0)

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The Surreal Life

  

Yesterday was filled with surreal experiences. It reminded me of the moments you watch in movies and wish you could experience for yourself. Breathtaking moments filled the day. I don’t even know where to begin. I’ll just make a list of these precious moments. 

– Blogging and swimming in the hotel pool area 

– Riding the bus with the locals 

– Hanging out at the Playa de Manuel Antonio

– Swimming in El Pacifico 

– Playing in the waves 

– ‘Dranking’ my margarita on the beach

– Writing my name in the sand 

– ATV riding through water channels, the jungle, dirt roads, and countryside for about a good hour and a half (magnificent views)

– Home cooked Costa Rican meal

– Seafood meal at El Gran Escape

– Ice cream shop 

– Relaxing at the hotel 

– Hangong out with the beau throughout it all 

My time in Quepos and Manuel Antonio has been well spent. It truly has felt like a vacation. I need daily life to feel like this. Maybe it’s time to go back overseas to live and work. Hmmm?? :0) 

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Human BEING vs. Human DOING

  

To be or not to be? To do or not to do? Those are the questions that should be pondered anytime you find yourself on a vacation from the daily routine. 

It’s Day 3 in Costa Rica and I find myself constantly wanting to DO. Why is that? Why is it so hard to just BE. It’s such a simple concept yet as I plan my days there’s this urge to fill it up with things to DO. 

In the midst of planning my to DO list, Costa Rica has a ‘power cut’. I imagine this happens city wide because no one seems to be phased by the fact that everything has just turned off. What’s even more interesting is I just got my answer: To BE or To DO? I guess I shall just BE. Hence the reason why I am now sitting poolside and writing this blog entry. 

Nothing beats a bit of stillness mixed with some physical adventure. I live in such a stimulating city which speaks to my desire to DO. It’s so annoying because I love that there are places in the world that celebrate the small things. In NYC it’s difficult to notice the small things when the big things are constantly stealing your attention. So here I am luxuriating by the pool, taking in the environment and just BEING. My physical adventure will include some ATV time at a farm mixed with views of a waterfall. Nothing like a bit of balance. 

Precious moments to remember Day 2:

– Working out with a view of the Pacific

– The heat!

– Meeting a black female Philadelphian who lives in Costa Rica 

– Horseback riding in the forest 

– Swimming in the waterfall springs

– Costa Rican meal (fish, rice, beans, veggies)

– Imperial Beer 

– The boring Grammy’s on TV 

– The dirt road and small towns on the way to horseback riding

– Discovering the supermarket 

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Costa Rican Realness

Damn…..how did I get here? Just 2 years ago I was practicing daily habits to ensure I remained present in the moment. These moments are where life happens! Yet and still I fell for it (forward and backward thinking). You know the rat race of life has a way of sucking you in and providing a sense of comfort that is undeniably addictive. Before you know it so much time has passed on by due to falling asleep behind the wheel of life. You wake up and find autopilot has been activated and you’ve been cruising at a sustainable altitude. However, due to a bit of turbulence (in the good sense) the plane plunges and dips into a new direction. You’re suddenly shaken out of your comfort zone yet curious and intrigued to know what lies ahead along this new path. The hunger and thirst for the journey is reigniting and now noticeable. It’s been there the entire time yet ignored due to life’s many distractions. You wonder how just how…. Heck when….did the rat race show itself into your life. Trust and believe…. It wasn’t invited! You take a sigh of relief and just thank GOD for waking you ON to a more present life experience. 

Costa Rica Realness is what snapped me out of life’s trance. Specifically, the culture, nature, food, drinks, and activities. They are truly maintaining my attention. I just now need to lean off of the extrinsic motivators and onto the intrinsic desire to walk confidently into the direction of the unknown. This is something I practiced everyday while living and teaching overseas. I still have yet to practice this on a regular basis in my American Life. It’s hard! It’s so hard finding a way to keep things fresh, new and exciting when your essentially following the same ole routine everyday. More importantly, after moving through the routine….being to exhausted to exude any effort towards the the idea of DOING anything else. Hence, BEING often associated with LAZINESS yet also understood as STILLNESS because it’s simply what you do when you’re not LIVING to WORK. I guess this is where and why one should ensure their job speaks to their passion. My field does, but my actual job location doesn’t. :0/ But I have a plan I’ve already set into motion. Stay tuned!

Precious moments to remember from DAY 1:

– Arrive into Costa Rica with an eye infection 

– Visit local pharmacy and have to hold complete conversation in Spanish to get appropriate antibiotic for my eyes

– My taxi friend Sergio 

– I’ve literally met 5 Sergio’s

– Rice and Beans for breakfast…Yummy!

– Hiking through the National Forest with my recovering foot and no water 

– Sloths and Monkeys! 

– Becky and her extended family 

– Parasailing in Manuel Antonio over the National Forest during sunset

– Rode the local city bus 

– Saying a prayer while traveling through the windy and hilly roads 

– Tibulia Treehouse Hotel 

– Swimming in the warm Pacific Ocean at National Park 

– Leaving the hotel in pants and returning to the hotel in swimming trunks, hat and tank top

– Cold shower 

– Invisible bird in the hotel room 

– Baby leans over bus seat attempting to grab a random mans French fries. Man gives baby a french fry and baby smiles. Mom notices French fry in babies hand and smiles. Mom and man begin chatting as if they are old friends from a past life
Sometimes it’s the small things that bring a smile to ones face. Those moments are often the ones that slip away. Write them down! 

This is mytruthmyclarity!  

 

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